i look at his silhouette on my screen...
i find myself lost in the well-being that his presence brings, i find myself brilliantly alive in the death throws of irrelevance. i wonder how i can be so close and so detached in such an intimate relationship which is so distant and far fetched.
i find myself cautioning the idiot that i am to not ever again fall in love, and i find myself wondering whether i have ever been in love. i find the answer to be irrefutably irrelevant.
i find myself wanting to touch his skin, and i find myself touching the skin of another.
we are in the car, he looks at me from the driver's seat and remarks on how i try to disappear deep inside my winter coat. i laugh, i feel good. i would want to hold on to that moment forever.
i find myself steering straight on my course, and i wonder how it was to be that he came into my experience. i feel there is magic in all of it. it is magic.
i search for the words, and do not find them. nothing can describe what i feel.
once i saw him and he impressed me, than i forgot. each time i am in his presence is being within that first great magic moment. all i wanted was to explore experiencing that being.
